Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Leading up to Diagnosis

The lead up to diagnosis was very fast, and scary after I had the ultrasound. Before the ultrasound I guess everything was usual. I had my routine pap smear and I skipped the breast exam. A couple weeks later I found a lump. I thought it was just from mastitus I has a week earlier so I tried to massage the lump out in the shower. It was still there after a couple weeks so I went to my doctor and asked for a breast exam. He assured me everything was fine and that the lump was nothing to be concerned about, especially at my age. I disagreed with him and told him I would feel more comfortable if the lump was examined. He told me that he would give me a referral for ultrasound but there was no rush because the lump would just dissolve over time. 

I waited a several months before getting very worried thast the lump hadnt dissolved and sought a second opinion. He encouraged me to get the ultrasound asap. Two days later I got the ultrasound and had the results a few days after that. My results came back as a lumpo with malignant characteristics. I was instantly terrified. My friends and family all insisted it must be something else as surely someone my age cannot have breast cancer.

My husband flew home from work and the next morning we met with a breast specialist and I had a core biopsy. It is not my fondest memory to date. After that we had a one week wait to get the results. Unfortunately I have "malignant carcinoma of the breast". I was shocked and terrified and in complete disbelief! In all honesty I was in disbelief until I went to the cancer center to recieve my "your Journey" breast cancer information pack 5 days later. Writing my name in a breast cancer journal made everything real. This is going to be really hard, but no one ever said cancer would be easy.

At the moment I find myself very emotional, irritated and stressed and I have so many fears. Even with all that I know I can beat this and I will come out the other end. I just pray I come out smiling and I can get my life back. I know I will have down days and here on this blog I will document almost everything. I really want to be able to share my journey, my highs and my lows so people can really understand or even to help another woman who is struggling with this as well.

I still have a couple weeks before my definative diagnosis. I have had my mammograms, ultrasounds, core biopsy and got my information pack. Surgery is next, and then we wait for results from pathology. Please pray with me for good news. Best case scenario is its non-invasive with no node involvement andf it hasn't spread...fingers crossed!

Thank you for reading my blog and I hope you follow me on this ride, to listen and learn and be there with me every step of the way.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Mary, I am so glad you have started this blog, and hope it does enable you to share what you need to, and more importantly, feel our support. We care about you very much, and it will be good to be able to know how you are doing with your treatment without having to ask constantly, so that hopefully we can get an idea how best to support you (and your family). Definitely praying the Sentinel Node Biopsy comes back clean!
    Take care, K.

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